7.30.2006
“Any change, even a change for the better, is always accompanied by drawbacks and discomforts.” -Arnold Bennett-
i understand that it may be hard for people to understand. you see one person leaving, another left behind, imagine the two of them growing apart, see resentment and bitterness growing between them, you believe you can see it all unraveling and can't comprehend why two people would do this or how it could possibly work...
but the crazy thing is, i'm not you. we aren't your parents or your friends or whoever it is that you know that had one person go away and the whole thing fell apart. we aren't the people on tv who leave each other's sight and suddenly forget the last eight years of our lives, embarking on self-destructive adventures all because we are bored by ourselves...
it doesn't make sense to me... after all this time, the question on everyone's minds switches so easily from "when are you getting married" to "are you breaking up?" savannah is in the same state as atlanta... within a mornings drive of it in fact. we aren't moving cross country or even as far as another state, so why the sudden concern? it's weird, i just don't get it.
is it the 100% perfect situation, exactly what i would have picked for myself and exactly where i pictured myself at this age? of course not... but there are things i have to get done, goals i've set for myself... and those are here in atlanta. and huey's goals, his dreams, are happening in savannah. for either of us to let those things go would be worse than a short year apart. i know i'll miss him... he's only been gone two days and i already miss him. it can suck not having your best friend around... but i've had years fly by before, i'm sure this one will be the same, and it's just one more adventure for the both of us... and i'm positive we'll both come out fine on the other side.
what has actually been on my mind the last few days while huey has been fielding all the breakup questions are my grades... as much as i try to not really care, i realized friday after checking the website for the 20th time that i really do want those A's after all, and will probably be kinda pissed if i don't get them. i don't know what it is i'm trying to prove, or who i'm trying to prove it to, but i want it and am going to be very selfish about it. at least it's something constructive to focus on...
speaking of costructive, i have a few things on my list of "to do" items today... so i guess i should do at least one of them...
*blog*
posted by megs at 16:32
|
|
