it's like asking a vegetarian why people eat meat...
why do people get married? what's the benefit of it? i am a 27 year old woman who has been in a relationship for almost 8 years. i have actively put off marriage while i watched all of my friends meet people, fall in love and tie the knot. of course i've always assumed that some day i'll get married, but not today... or tomorrow. or prolly anytime in the near future. i know that marriage isn't a means to an end... people can live together and have healthy, committed relationships without having to ever do it. i know that it is important to some people because it signifies making a lasting commitment, despite the fact that divorce rates are still pretty high and usually pretty easy to get. so many people treat it as a logical next step... you date for a certain period of time so it's just natural to do it, to take things to the next level. but does it change anything? does it fundamentally alter your relationship? i don't believe that it does or that it should...
i know that some people say that they don't want to get married because they are afraid of commitment... i even used to think that about myself. it's only been lately that i realized that i wasn't afraid of commitment; why would we be in a such a long relationship and living together if i were? i think i was just afraid of admitting that i might need someone so much. it is scary to think that so much of my happiness might depend on someone loving me and being with me because there are so many things we can't control in life. it's taken me a long time to find the right balance betwen my need for self-sufficiency and my dependence on another person...
i have to admit, some people just aren't the marrying type... but i think other people try to put themselves in that category because they are afraid that it's not happening for them. to them, marriage is just sour grapes... they call it a pointless ceremony, say that it's only important on paper. maybe they are right, and maybe they are wrong... things happen, changing our minds everyday.
so what is the point of all this rambling? that this isn't the kind of subject you can debate... there is no one answer. but i think the fact that you are asking someone else about it instead of just making up your mind one way or the other means you still have a long way to go before you really know what is right for you. just let it go...
