i don't know what it is, but for some reason i really suck at and despise group projects at school. i don't like working on a team at all. you always have that awkward first meeting where everyone is trying to figure out what role they play in the group and you can really get held up if you have two people who love to hear themselves talk because they will butt heads for the next hour while everyone shifts uncomfortably and looks at their watches.
my other big issue is that i like things done a certain way. call me controlling, but most of the time i just think my way is pretty good. i'm not stupid enough to say all the time, but a lot of the times. when it comes to trying to get things done in a group, everyone wants to do it their own way and it doesn't make for a very cohesive finished product. i always volunteer to be the one who will compile all the work because i'm arrogant enough to think that i need to double check everyone's work.
i know i have all these issues, i know that they are not good, and i know i need to just relax and perhaps let it go. it's just hard with someone like me who has an internal locus of control. i can't just turn that off and leave my academic fate to a couple of 19/20 yr olds who do god knows what when they are out of class (i know what i was doing at that age, and it wasn't homework). huey says i need to relax and trust other people... but i don't trust people unless i've known them for a very long time. i've talked about this on multiple occassions before, over the past few years in fact, but it seems i won't ever really change.
so i'm going to duck my head, grit my teeth and just get through it. only 3 more weeks of class left this semester!! woo hoo!
on a more upbeat note, huey's family is going on a cruise next spring and if i can pay my way i can go! it's a bahamas cruise and i haven't been there yet so i figured, why not? besides, i didn't get to swim with the sting rays last time because of the choppy waters at grand cayman so it's on the top of my list this time. and with huey in savannah, it'll be the perfect chance to get to spend whole week with him! i have a feeling vacation scheduling will be a lot harder when time off will be spent just getting back and forth to see each other. boo to long distance relationships! yay to cruises!!!
